i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
My vagina is officially offended.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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