He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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