i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
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