we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
The feeling are messing with the penis
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize