just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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