This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
