I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
