I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize