I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
