i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
