so explain again why im purple
no
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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