a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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