My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize