do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
