So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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