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Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
only you would photoshop your dick
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
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