just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
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