We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I need a burrito and a hug.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
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