WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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