my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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