i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
