im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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