You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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