she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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