she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize