So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I just want nice things and good sex
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
