i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
A bitchslap is in order.
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