dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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