My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
