remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
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