its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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