But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Crop dusting thru forever 21
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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