names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
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im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
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Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
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