i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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