That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
True but thats because hes a fetus.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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