I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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