reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
