I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
