so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
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