I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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