Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
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