so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
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