my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
