it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
A bitchslap is in order.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize