did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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