Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
You ruined the universe
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
