I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
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He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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