Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
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i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
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Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.