"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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