do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
