he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Randomize
