Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
